Good news for single women: Guys want more than a pretty face!
These unconventional traits turn him on, proving you can attract men sans-makeover. Eavesdrop on any pre-date pep talk, and you'll probably hear the typical woman-to-woman dating advice: Play it cool, do your hair like this—and whatever you do, don't wear that.
But while those traditional tips aren't necessarily wrong, there are other, way more important traits that research shows men find attractive—and they have nothing to do with your physical appearance. Traditional dating advice has been leading us on a wild goose chase, one that leads away from the possibility of real, healthy love, says Ken Page, the author of Deeper Dating.
Relationships are built on authenticity and connection, he explains. And the best news? You probably already have them.
The most important characteristic is also the most basic, Page says. One major study asked 10, men and women what quality they find most important in a mate. The number one response across the board? And it doesn't take a lot to demonstrate these traits.
Small acts of kindness, like being on time, letting the other person order first and choose where to sit, and being polite to the server, are clear ways to show consideration. Forget playing it cool. Researchers who study speed dating events—where men and women basically make decisions in mere minutes—found that simply showing interest can build attraction.
How to do it: Listen closely and ask questions, Page suggests.
Also, consider body language. Research shows that bodily movements, controlled by the limbic system in our brain, are particularly important for romance, because that part of our brain is also responsible for our feelings of love fascinating, right? Focus on positive body language: Beauty really is more than skin deep.
Research shows that positive personality traits can impact perceptions of physical attractiveness, Nicholson says. It may not be groundbreaking, but men are indeed attracted to pleasant, positive, and cheerful personalities in women, he explains.
These positive personality traits I love sexy women associated not only with higher physical attraction but also social attraction—a key factor in choosing a long-term partner. Can't lie for the life of you?
That's a good thing when it comes to love. For one, research has shown men are more sensitive to sexual infidelity than women likely for evolutionary reasons—they want to be sure their offspring is actually theirs!
And it's not like you needed another reason to be honest, but research finds that perceived honesty affects judgments of physical attractiveness as well, Nicholson says.
In the study, participants deemed "honest" people as more fit, healthy, and kind.
No matter how perfect your relationship is, fights happen. But there are four fighting styles, known in psychology as the four horseman of divorcewhich signal a relationship is doomed, says Sean Horan, Ph.
When fighting, remember that you care about each other and that you have the same goals, Horan says. And don't shut your S. Talk about the issue, watch your words, and try to use "I" statements "I feel disregarded when you're late to events" rather than blaming "you" statements "You are never on I love sexy women
Learn how to Confront Common Relationship Roadblocks with advice from experts. Your obsession with Harry Potter or that passion for tap dancing pay off.
So despite what Victoria's Secret catalogues may suggest, there's no need to be the same as everyone else.
It may sound conventional, but being yourself is a much better strategy, Nicholson says. Do you, especially if that "you" includes wizadry and tap shoes.
Want to take up something new? It's the same with a relationship: Of course you like being with the person, but you can't be with him all the time.
You need to maintain your independence when you become part of a couple, and the same goes for your partner. Plus, in today's society, we've become more reliant on our partners to meet basically all of our needs, says Page.
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Keep up your yoga-and-brunch dates with the girls, and encourage him to hang out with the guys. Join Now Log In. Search form Search Shape Magazine.
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